I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
