u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
