It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
