Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
not ubering you a puppy
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize
