You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize