When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
