After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
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