I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Randomize
