Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
