last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
