I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
