Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize