Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I love you. Go after that dick
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
