none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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