I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
