With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
