What a fucking waste of an outfit
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
Randomize
