Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Randomize
