:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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