I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize