I am apparently in rockville maryland. I just threw up my tater tots I had fro brunch in a safeway parking lot. Then ordered a pizza. Pepperoni and pineapple. I'm sitting in the parking lot, next to my barf, waiting for my pizza. WOOF. Someone just gave me an oxycontin tab. Can u come get me? I'm scared
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
