Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
