walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
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