I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
