i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
she told me i tasted like america
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
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