My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
