in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
