I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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