Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
