i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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