Can Purell be used as lube?
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
