i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I had to cum in my sink.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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