don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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