I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Randomize
