I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
