You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
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