So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
