OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
