I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
i out mim tonsoeep
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