No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
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