Just mADE A PArabola og urine
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
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