I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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