I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
