Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Randomize
