i jhust puked up my retainher.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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