I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
