Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
