was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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