You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
