why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
